Interests:Performing~Writing~Crocheting (Nice segue, eh?)~Sketching~Fashion Design~Music (Making/Listening)~Et Cetera (Although I do like the "et" more than the "cetera") Occupation:Artist Industry:Entertainment
So, eating like three glasses of Swiss Miss/milk sludge + McDonald's RIGHT before bed = "Hey! It's 6 o'clock in the morning and I'm awake crappin' my guts out...Oh, wait. What's that? I have to stay up now because I'll have more exploding butt vomit every fifteen minutes or so for the next five hours? Neat." But since I AM awake I've taken the liberty of photologging this misadventure. Enjoy (or whatever it is you do when one of your friends has
.
Here's me right before another trip to Poofest 2007:
Here's me right after:
And here's me during a trip to Nose Candy, Wisconsin:
And here's me right after:
Well, that pretty much wraps that up.
On a different note, the last time I looked at my blog views the number was 1984 (the year of my birth) and now it's 2007. I think the Internets are trying to telling me something. I'll let you know when I find out what. Oh, and to be precise the "date" is 10.24.2007. See:
So, lemme know if you have any ideas.
PS: Oh, and meet my friend Josh Paul. He's always there, waiting for the perfect moment to unleash his cool upon you. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand...
Okay so I'm importing my blog to Facebook now. Thank Laura Lee. And besides, I'm rethinking the switch and I'll probably be at least spending more time on everyone else's sites here at Xanga. Still plan to read my blog on Facebook or Myspace though cos I might not update here so much.
Anyway, comment on something though cos that's the only thing I miss from my Xanga days!
...but if you happen to be a non-myspacer who prefers xanga, I've almost completely switched over now so if you wanna read my blog and keep up with me, skibble on over to www.myspace.com/cinderfelladown --- I still update xanga every once in a while though so you don't have to delete me or anything (again, I'm pretty sure the only person that still reads my xanga blog is my mother so, Marmie, if you're reading, I'll call you soon:).
I miss home. And when I say "home" I don't just mean Columbus. I mean, the people that I call family. I miss my Marmie more than I can say and for some selfish reason when I miss her this much calling seems almost out of the question, like I'll just end up missing her to the point of a nervous break down if I hear her voice. I want to be with her for her surgery and I can't be. My understudy taped one of the performances. I'm gonna try and get that to Marmie so she can see what I've been doing here at least. Please pray for her. I know God's taking care of her body, I just want all the support and prayer I can get for her. If you haven't met her, you've at least heard me talk about how amazing she is, and if you have met her, then you know that God put a little extra in when he was working on her.
I also miss Ley. I got a card from her this morning and my whole body aches. Being far away from people that I love is something I'm used to at this point, but again, when you know someone needs you and you can't get to them, your heart all but explodes in your chest. I'm going to call her. This is too much. I'm going to call Marmie and Ley. And perhaps even Krissy who I feel completely cut off from as well. I miss that girl. I can't even remember the last time we talked. That's not the way I want things between us.
That's it. Enough blogging. I'm getting on the phone.
This is sick, I know, but I just cut and pasted my Myspace blogs since my last Xanga update. If you've got the time, catch up. If not, skim. Either way, here's what's up...
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Whistle While You Irk Current mood: awake Category: Friends
Why do girls DO that?! That whole "announcing" thing where they proclaim to the masses that they're "in the loop" with whatever guy by making stupid and obvious "general statements" about conversations they've had with him or things they have in common. Yeeshk! Let's try actually being friends with people, eh? Ya know, without the running commentary.
I understand that there's some horrible bone within the female body that makes it almost impossible not to "stick it" to other girls by staking a claim of some kind on the nearest male and then deny any foul play. I get it ladies. It's inborn. But that doesn't mean you can't fight it. So, the next time you go traipsing about pretending that your actions are "innocent" and that you're "just being a friend" or my personal favorite "that's just the way we are together" ask yourself who you're showing off for. And perhaps take the time to really, honestly answer that question for yourself. Don't just shrug it off like we tend to do to let ourselves feel better. Really deal with what's going on inside of you. Maybe you're jealous, maybe you're hurt, maybe you're just a little bit lonely like the rest of the world. Fine. Just DEAL with it and stop dragging other people down in the process. I mean, I'm on no pedestal here. It's gonna take a group girl effort to make any real change in this area of behavior. But if we all work together and stop treating each other like competition and then acting all oblivious to our inner siren, the world might be a better place.
I'm so thankful for the female friends in my life. But goodness knows I probably wouldn't have them if we weren't 200% honest about ourselves--even the things we're ashamed of. And, yeah, I'm certain that not falling for the same guys really helps keep any angst away from the friendships too but that's partially on purpose. Why fall for your best friend's guy when you can keep this awesome girl you've come to know and love as your bestest and just find a new guy to drive you insane? Wait. Scratch that. Why fall for any girl's guy when you could just find another one to make you all b'jiggity inside? And if anyone out there is even thinking of using the whole "you can't help who you fall in love with" retort, lemme nip that in the bud with "True, but you can help who you spend all your time with and maybe if you choose to spend less time with certain people things won't have a chance to get that far."
Whoo...That has been on my plate and in my heart for far too long. I'm glad to finally release it and perhaps recoup a little. I just hate what we ladies have a tendency to do to each other, and for what? A MAN?! Have you ever met one of them?! They're largely overrated. Find a female in your life that you relate to and can trust. Granted, the trust thing may take a while, but it's totally worth it. Anyway, go have lunch, tea, dinner, whatever with her and when need be spill your guts. Let her spill hers. You'll both feel better and a lot less paranoid.
Oh, and make sure she's okay with you talking about the same guy endlessly until you die. That's a prerequisite for all my friends.
Love & Marriage Current mood: irritated Category: Life
I think gossip is for people without personalities. It's like "if you're not interesting on your own, just gab about other people's lives." I can't stand that. I'd rather just be boring than have to talk about other people's business all the time or "always" telling a story about "bla bla bla" that happened "bla dee bla dee bla" and how hilarious "so and so" was "that one time." Sure, it's bad enough that all my stories involve the same three people but at least they're my own and I tell them when the conversation lends itself to a quick anecdote and not just because there are people in the room to talk to.
And now for a more different rant...
Getting married does not magically make you a grown up. Am I the only person who got that memo? Certainly not since I have plenty of married friends who don't put on heirs and act like they've "been around the block" or something just because they got hitched at 20. I'm all for finding and committing to someone you love for the rest of your lives, and if you choose to do that sooner rather than later, fine. Great. Good for you. But keep in mind that you're still the naive little 20-something you were before the rings, the vows, and the socially acceptable romps in the hay. You didn't age 10 years overnight and while your worldly possessions might have been spruced up a bit (thanks to registries and wealthy family members), you're still a kid. That's just true. You're not more mature than you're non-married friends and that's okay. You don't have to prove that you're "whatever" enough to be married by acting a certain way. Believe me, you won't prove anything and you'll just annoy the people around you who know you're just playing house. I'm pretty sure the only thing even remotely capable of turning we youngsters into anything deserving the title "adult" (short of personal tragedy which seems to force everyone to grow up fast) is parenthood. And truthfully, that's not even a sure bet. Just look at Ms. Spears (and the many baby mamas and papas on any given daytime talk show).
I'll close by saying that by the time I tie the knot, I hope I will have gained some actual wisdom so I don't have to try and fabricate it for all the cool kids. And if children ever do come into the mix, let's pray I've gained a few hefty pounds of selflessness to boot.
Throwing Up & Making Friends Current mood: tired Category: Games
So, I'd be lying if I said I was thrilled when my male roomies set up a PS2 in our living room a few days ago, but as it turns out, I'm a completely easy convert to the dark, dark world of "let's all beat the crap out of each other" video games. Not an hour after I was handed a controller was I kicking butt and taking names. Apparently doing the same move over and over again without stopping for breath wins fights against even the toughest competitors.
Now, I know this may be considered "lame" or "unfair" by serious gamers (I mean, those words were definitely tossed around last night as the boys had their tushies handed to them by a pretty little girl) but I say, go with what works. If kicking your guy in the face repeatedly wins the match, then that's what I'm gonna do. I'll admit I possess no real skill in the game, but I certainly won't stop winning. It's not my fault I'm fast.
So, now I'm gonna be spending most of my free time making my thumbs sore, right? Wrong. I woke up this morning with a most tired voice and three shows to do. I was NOT HAPPY. It seems that until Amber can learn to suppress her inner frat boy and play Soul Calibur III in silence, she's no longer permitted to play. Says who? Says me.
In other news, I totally vomited last night. That's right: vomited. In our living room, no less. I started laughing at a photo online with my friend Brian and before I knew it bad, bad salmon came up and outta my throat and onto the carpet. HOW could I possibly have thrown up right on the floor?! WHY couldn't I have made it to the bathroom?! Well, a combination of oddly placed furniture, a borrowed computer in my lap, and the completely sudden onset of the pukiness did not make for a speedy getaway. Oddly enough, the biggest news for the night was still that I was converted into a gamer. I don't know how that trumps vomit on the carpet but I'm not complaining.
To conclude, don't eat old salmon and don't wear out your voice playing video games. Both are bad health choices. And besides, Dan's right. There are much better ways for me to use my time (although the bonding with the boys was priceless).
Guarini's Revenge - OR - Amber & The Ugly Sleep Monster Current mood: Smushy Category: Smushy Parties and Nightlife
I just don't think I'll ever be one of those girls who wakes up looking just as striking and delicate as she did upon falling to sleep. I'm lucky to wake with an actual human face and not the puffy, Picasso-esque abomination with which I'm often stuck. And that's usually after an unfortunately warm and/or muggy night. What is it about heat while I sleep that makes my face go all wrong? I wake up feeling like an old stretch of cement sidewalk. I went to bed all fresh and shiny (You ever noticed how newly poured sidewalk has a slight shimmer to it?) and woke up looking like something a hooker rests on when business is slow. You never see hookers on new sidewalk. It just isn't done.
I just ate all the apple sauce in the world. Sorry.
Anyway, so ugly sleep. I have it.
You remember those girls in college who took like 9 hours to get ready for class each day? Well, ladies and jellyspoons, I was NOT one of those girls. My professors and classmates were lucky if I came to class in anything other than a hoody and sweatpants (and for the record, they weren't lucky very often). What I'm trying to say is that I'm okay with looking a little hit (or a lot hit, if we're referring to my senior year...I REALLY gave up on style there for a while). I mean, there, I'm at least in control of the ugly, but to go to sleep and have some kind of Ugly Sleep Monster attack you when you're not even awake to defend yourself is a tad unfair, don'tcha think? And, granted, things could be worse. It's not like I woke up without a leg or something. But the simple fact that I went to bed last night looking like a normal, feminine girl and woke up looking like Justin Guarini warrants a little frustration if I do say so myself (and I do).
On the upside, I get to stop at Starbucks on the way to work today with my new friend and castmate, Michelle. We share a love for the 'bucks AND a last name. I like her. She's fun and a killer dancer. I shall feed her nuts and berries so she'll keep coming to my window. (I've tried retyping that so as not to imply that I'm providing some sort of meal to a bag of trail mix she owns, but alas...)
So, on that note, I'm off to YouTube to watch the opening sequences of my favorite childhood tv shows.
Okay, so my show at CG opens TOMORROW. Insane much? Yes, Ma'am.
Thankfully, my body's recovered a bit from the 8-hr dance sessions I've endured these past few days, and honestly, after tonight's final run through, I felt pretty good about where we are with the show. All that said, I still can't escape the obvious apprehension swimming around me due to the fact that we've only been rehearsing for, oh, four days at this point. I hate to say it but I'm actually a little put off at the clear amount of confidence our director has in our collective ability to put this show up so quickly. I mean, I'm all about a challenge, but MY GOODNESS! Don't get me wrong, I'm sure that come 3:30 tomorrow afternoon, that old black theatre magic will kick in like clockwork and the show'll go off without a hitch. I'm just saying don't think that'll keep me from sending up a few before the show---cos it won't.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand on that note, since sleepy just hit me like a ton a bricks, I'm off to bed.
I said "Hey! What's going on?" Current mood: groggy Category: Travel and Places
First of all, I did a cut/paste job on this blog. I was typing a response to one J Ryan Dawes who recently joined our online Myspace family (dysfunctional as it may be) and thought, "Hey! Nice update. You should let everyone know what's goin' on...and why fix what ain't broke?" SO...here 'tis:
Oh, wait! I almost forgot my "second of all"...
Second of all, yes, I DO realize how lazy this whole thing is.
Okay, NOW you can read it:
In other news, if you find yourself at a lack of things to pray for, you could send a few up for me. I'm starting a new job on Monday which includes moving and the whole sh'bang. The Christmas season at Holy Land ends this Saturday and I was offered a job at Cypress Gardens in Winter Haven, FL (only about an hour away from Orlando, go fig...and by "go fig" I mean of course, that this is so a "God thing") so I'm taking the job. It's such a quick transition though so I'm quite stressed (especially with all the other changes going on...Marmie's got her surgery next month, Dan's going to Japan, UPTA's coming up and I still have headshots to send in...Okay, so that last one doesn't even compare to the others but it came to mind when I typed the UPTA bit). Readers' Digest version: Amber's got the stress (I guess I coulda saved you the time and just typed that, but then you wouldn't feel "in the loop").
So, back to real time, that's the gist. And while I'd love to elaborate, I'm currently battling some sort of body-attacking sicky monster that, I assure you, shall NOT take me down, but is certainly trying. I'm thinking it's a combination of a marshmallow cream overdose and last week's cold bidding a final adieu. The good news: my body was pretty much ready to give in a few hours ago, but now I'm feeling...well...less like John Hurt in "Alien" so that's something. Plus, the night's looking up since I think Dan's coming to rescue me soon (or at least to distract me from discomfort with lots of love and Brad Pitt filmage). My point being that I need m'rest so I'm gonna shower up and get some.
Gnadenhutten ya'll.
PS: I didn't proof read this (which should prove how ill I truly am) so please forgive any grammatical/structural/typing errors.
PPS: What kind of nerd apologizes for her blog grammar? Wow. I'm more lame than I thought. Good to know.
awake 
irritated 
tired 
sleepy 
groggy 